Wednesday, May 23, 2012

a hard day

I just threatened to take an imaginary turtle away from Jack if he got out of bed again.  It didn't really register what I had said until I was walking away from his room.

"Don't get out of bed again or I'm taking your turtle," I said.

He found a imaginary turtle outside today and insisted we put him in a plastic container.  He's taken it in the bath and now he's cuddling with it in bed.

The thing is, he'll cry if I come back for that turtle... that kid has a kickass imagination.

Today has been hard.

Not hard in the Mommy department, but more of just the stresses of life.  I feel like the weight of our world is on my shoulders... I had my what?... third official breakdown today?  The kind where you cry and say the stress is getting to you, the kind where you can't stop crying even if you want to.

It's the kind of stress where people tell you to hand it to God, where you don't see how it's going to work out, how it's going to be okay, but you know that it will, because it always does.

Joel after telling me he was tired of my manic depressive ways, told me I needed to get out of the house, and after he offered to make me grilled cheese (no thank you, lol) he took us to Bob Evans for dinner.

I needed that.  A normal family dinner, one where I didn't have to cook or clean up after anyone... and to get out of the house.  I love that Joel.

On our way to dinner, I told Joel to check the mail, and my Amazon book that I treated myself to finally arrived, "Soul Centered."  It's a meditation book, lol.  If only it had arrived yesterday!

I'm glad today is almost over.

What do you do when you're feeling overwhelmed?


  1. I hear ya! I usually crank up the 80s music channel or put on some old school rap. Music definitely helps me calm down when I'm going crazy.

  2. oh olivia, i love your words always and how real you are. i'm sorry you had a trying and tough day. i laughed at the imaginary turtle comment...that's so sweet...he is such a smart boy.

    i feel ya, sister. it's too bad we don't live closer, we could share a couple boxes of tissues and go out for ice cream. i know exactly the kinds of cries that don't stop even if you try...where you can't catch your breath and you wake up looking like you got punched in both eyes.

    what a sweet<3 husband you have. dinner together and a nice surprise in the mail sounds like the perfect remedy.
    you're in my thoughts and prayers. and i hope that today has been a good one and the rest of the week/end continues that way <3

    lots and lots of love.

  3. Man, oh man do I know where you are at! Today during nap time I decided to lay out and catch some rays in the driveway. While I was laying there, I was literally trying to FORCE the tension to leave my body. You know how "experts" say to lay down, breathe deeply and relax your muscles.. well I couldn't even get my body to "relax." All I could think about as I laid there in complete silence was the house, the bills, our future, the kids, my relationship with Bud, etc. So my intentions of laying out to try and relax totally flopped lol. Bud says I think too much. Maybe you're the same?

    I definitely hope things lighten up for you. When the stress piles, I usually find that 1. a good cry and 2. a night out help me significantly. Oh, and of course some comfort food... mmm sugar!! :)

  4. so sorry today has been hard! i can only imagine (going back to my nannying days, as i'm not yet a mother). but you got to hand it to the little guy and his amazing imagination with that turtle!
    xo TJ

  5. I have those days more often than not, and I can't use the pregnant excuse. When I'm feeling that way, the only way to make me feel better to cuddles with The Hubs or baby, Sonic Diet Dr. Pepper and cheddar bites, and/or dinner out. I'm with you though because not having to cook and clean up after dinner is the BEST treat in the world.

    1. mmm Dr. Pepper! I hear ya. I feel like since I wrote this post, I've come to accept there are lot of things right now up in the air... and I'm okay with not having all the answers or having everything perfect. I have hope things will get better. Thanks for the sweet comment Addie!


"Perhaps you will forget tomorrow the kind words you say today, but the recipient may cherish them over a lifetime." -Dale Carnegie

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